so, i’ve had a lot of free time over the summer. i’ve played a handful of video games, and watched a lot of television and movies. while some of those tv shows and movies were extremely entertaining, i still believe that i could have produced something more extraordinary. with this belief, i’ve compiled a handful of ideas that could contribute to what could possibly be the best movie ever. these ideas are categorized into a few different things, quotes and saying that would piece the movie together, as well as songs i’d put in its soundtrack, and even a list of actors and actresses that i feel would help bring the movie in the right direction. though i may not ever be able to create this blockbuster, i’d like to share with you what i’ve come up with.
here, i will list components that could make the ultimate movie. i will try to include as many examples and references when applicable. prepare yourself for a long post.
possible quotes, catchphrases, and one liners
like every great movie, these are the things that really bring a movie together. making it memorable through many generations. here are some lines, both new and used, that i feel would really make a movie worth watching. (note that some of these lines may be variations of what you have heard before)
- someone saying “welcome to earth” after they punch someone, preferably an alien.
eg: Will Smith in “Independence Day” - in some point of the movie, a character would somehow state the name of the movie in context.
eg: “It would be… the perfect storm,” “This is our final fantasy“ - someone saying “yippie-kay-yay mother f*cker”
eg: Bruce Willis in “Die Hard 2” - after a surprising appearance, someone saying “Professor! I thought you were dead!” “Not dead enough”
- “what do you mean cut the blue wire? THEY’RE ALL BLUE!”
- someone saying “aw hell naw,” preferably Will Smith
eg: (1:41) in the iRobot movie trailer - “that’s so crazy, it might just work!”
reference - someone saying “whoa,” preferably with a head turn
as commonly said by Joey Lawrence and Keanu Reeves - “i made my family… disappear.. i made my family disappear”
eg: Macaulay Culkin in Home Alone - jackie chan saying “i don’t want no trouble” in a situation to avoid danger
- “i’m getting to old for this”
eg: Danny Glover in “Lethal Weapon”
soundtrack
a movie is considered to be lifeless without some music. with music, viewers are able to convey the mood that the writers have originally intended. here are some songs that have proven to be quite moving.
- “the mighty ducks theme song” composed by david newman from “mighty ducks”
this piece may be one of the most nostalgic pieces that you’ll ever come across. used properly, this song is lethal enough to blow minds, which i’ll cover later on. - “space jam” by quad city dj’s from “space jam”
sadly enough, they’ve taken down the version with lyrics on youtube, but i’ll trust that you’ll know the lyrics by heart anyway. - “glory of love” by peter cetera as heard from “the karate kid 2”
- “you’re the best around” by joe esposito from “the karate kid”
- “dreams” by the cranberries from “the next karate kid”
yes, that’s right. you’ve just witnessed not one, but THREE songs from the karate kid movie series. even the one with hilary swank. - “you make my dreams come true” by hall & oates as heard from the movies, “the wedding singer,” “step brothers,” and even the fake movie starring jack black in the tv series, “the office”
for some reason, i felt like this song was used in every adam sandler movie, or at least thats what it seemed like to me - “all-star” by smash mouth, which seemed to be in every movie trailer made in the 90s
honestly, i hate this song. you should too, but it’s one of those songs that is in every movie/trailer, including shrek, digimon: the movie, mystery men, inspector gadget, and rat race. this song makes me cringe. - “oh yeah” by yello, as popularized by “ferris bueller’s day off”
might as well. - “don’t wanna miss a thing” by aerosmith, as heard from the movie, “armagedon”
face it, you still listen to this song before you go to sleep. it haunts you that bruce willis left your life at the end of the movie, but aerosmith made it okay for you to cry. if you ever look at the track list for the armagedon soundtrack, you’ll notice that almost all of it is aerosmith, but they don’t really matter. this is the only song that you want to be with you, right here with you, just like this. - “mary tyler moore theme song/love is all around” by paul williams, as heard from “mary tyler moore”
personally can’t say that i’ve ever watched this show, but hey. it has a good theme song. might be familiar to ya. - “hide and seek” by imogen heap, as popularized by tv series, “the oc” and snl parody
mmmwhatcha saaaaaaay? - “america’s funniest home videos theme song (acoustic)” performed by “adrianholovaty” from “america’s funniest home videos,” obviously.
you think i’m crazy now, but listen to it. i can almost guarentee that you’ll cry. i’m being so honest right now. - “chariots of fire” by vangelis
not necessary sure of all the movies that this has been a part of, but for sure it was in “chariots of fire.” makes sense to me. you can’t hit inspirational without a song like this. i swear this song plays in my head for every time i participate in something competetive. why shouldn’t it be in my movie? - “baby come back” by player
i don’t really have an explanation for this song. i’ll just throw this one in there. - “who loves you” by franki valli and the four seasons
at this point, i’m pretty much just posting ridiculous songs. ridiculously good songs that is. i don’t really have much of an explanation for this song either, haha. and this video had the best song quality i was able to find. them skating on ice is just a plus, i guess. - “somewhere out there” from “an american tail”
did he just say an american tail??? yes, yes i just did. you and i both miss this movie. i’ll explain this song choice in the next section. - “be a star” by lindsay lohan and tyra banks from “life size”
with a song like this, i’d be able to make a movie that both shines bright and far
scenes and action
what’s a movie without some action? here are some specific things that i put in the ultimate movie. making it as ultimate as possible.
- a scene were two people are looking at the moon at the same time, and they are faded together to make it seem like they are singing to each other, but in fact, are not in each others presence. this is the one scene that gets you at the heart.
eg: “An American Tail” (see earlier point in “soundtrack” section) - the legendary “freeze frame high five”
this is one of those things that is a must. the freeze frame high five has been making movies and televison as awesome as it is now. i wasn’t really able to pinpoint the specific example i was looking for, sorry about that, but seriously. does anyone else feel like every episode of “boy meets world” ended with one?
-on a related note, at the end of “D3: The Mighty Ducks (5:33)”, there is a slow motion high five/fist pump where their hands spark fireworks as their make contact. best ending ever. - emotional scene where two people are “so close, yet so far” from each other, separated by a plate of glass. so emotional in fact where they both place one hand on each side of the glass.
eg: “Star Trek: Wrath of Khan” (4:56) - why end the movie with just a black screen when you can end it by a celebration by campfire and borderline butchering a queen song?
eg: “D2: The Mighty Ducks“ - of course, in every movie, there are only a few ways to come to a solution to any problem. there must be a final competition by either by karate match, race down a skiing/snowboarding slope, playing to the highest score on a game of super mario 3.
eg: “The Karate Kid,” “Johnny Tsunami,” and “The Wizard“ - can’t beat him? too scrawny? how about training and making a montage about it?
eg: “Rocky IV“ - of the most bad ass ways to leave the earth, this by far must be one of the best ways, by being lit on fire. i want there to be a jedi burial in my movie. on a related note, when i die, i want a jedi burial as well.
eg: “Star Wars: Episode IV Return of the Jedi“ - being fancy and going glove side.
eg: “D2: The Mighty Ducks”
he didn’t even really do a triple deke. though he did deke three times, he stopped and took a slap shot, which really defeats the purpose at that point. but seriously, why would you ever consider going glove side on the best glove from bangor, maine? i’d go five hole on her every time. - a lock must be opened by use of TWO KEYS AT THE SAME TIME. this can also be accompanied by two people nodding to each other at the same time simutaneously beforehand.
reference - cool guys don’t look at explosions.
as stated in “cool guys don’t look at explosions” by the lonely island - two things. p-swayz and pot molding.
eg: “Ghost“ - this may be the most important part of any movie, whether it be when fighting a race of aliens dominating planets for natural resources or during a ice hockey game between team usa and iceland, a movie must contain the uplifting words to bring a team, or even a nation, together. WE ARE LIONS
eg: “40 Inspirational Speeches in 2 Minutes,” “Independence Day,” “D2: The Mighty Ducks“ - two people surgically removing their faces and switching them with each other.
eg: “Face Off“
possible actors
here are a handful of random actors that i feel can help piece together a movie that can impact the world of entertainment.
- will smith
of course, he would be a great choice if this movie were to involve some sort of science fiction; ie. aliens, robots, zombies, or giant robot spiders. and i’d need somebody to say, “aw hell naw.” - emilio estevez
do i really need an explanation for this one? greatest coach in the history of coaches. he even had his own cardboard cut out. it’s a shame he pretty much became extinct after D3. - jason segel
how i met your mother, freaks & geeks, forgetting sarah marshall, i love you, man. every single role he plays is one that is hilarious. he’s a naturally funny guy who delivers. - yvonne strahovski
after watching chuck, i couldn’t get a enough of her. why not put her in a movie? - comet the dog (from full house)
most talented dog that was in the business. arguably more adorable than michelle tanner herself. - john stamos
mullet john stamos only. i’d really only need him to sing “forever“ - lou ferrigno
you’ll like him when he’s angry. - jeff goldblum
i need someone to play a smart guy, who could also pilot an alien aircraft to help save the world. - rashida jones
beautiful, funny. throw her in there and we’ll see what happens. - nicholas cage
someone has to take their face off. - john travolta
(see nicholas cage) - lori loughlin
we already have uncle jesse and comet the dog, let’s just throw aunt becky in there as well. - danny glover
for reasons more neccessary than you’ll ever imagine.
and that’s where i’ll end this post. hopefully you guys enjoyed what i’ve put together. i’ll congratulate you if you made it this far going through all the links. it’s…. a handful. just think about it. i’m sure a lot of what i just said is pretty much random, but with a little creativity and imagination, you can create a mental video of it all.
ps: the movie poster would be around these lines.
a day in the life 